-i still haven't got the idea that he is still with "D'MOM", mom of his daughter when he pushed my life to him.
-HIS MOM AND SISTERS got a fishy look on me, because they are devoted with "d'mom" for him. they hate me.
-he still isn't over "NASTY BITCH".
-MY MOM knew that he got kids already. She is not in favor of him for me.
Barriers, reasons why I am not fully happy when we're together when we're supposed to be. Yes, he got STD. That's one thing I can't accept. Great thing I'm cured already.
But personally, whoever you are, as long as I LOVE? you, I will accept you for who you are. But barriers are inevitable. I can't be hated by his family forever while I'm in the artists' world. I can't be talked by the town being known that I was with him when he is still with "D'MOM" at the same time. I was a thief, I know, without my knowledge of his real status. After knowing the truth, that starts the misery of hurting my heart. I admit, I grew unexplainable feelings for him. From that; hurt, hatred and vengeance rooted and starts to vast. I could've a farm of sadness, pain, lust, hatred, love, etc.
I admit, I could've loved you,"Loathe" but without barriers maybe.
Why do you have to keep "D'mom" when you would want me?
You could even talk to my mom decently, why didn't you do it when we're together before?
Why do you have to stick with nasty bitch where you got your STD worse is HIV?
Why do you have to take my heart when you can't even handle it?
You have irrational reasons that attempted me to leave you but you would let me go. Why do you have to keep this illegal relationship long, that you know in the end would hurt me?
Do you find happiness by hurting every woman on earth?
Yes, when D'mom left you. You are here with me, but still nasty bitch doesn't stay out of your life. You even fought for her. Is she the best fuck that you ever had?
LOVE, LUST, AND PAIN... with a total of LOATHE.
Reason why I left you.
Recently I might be regretting. I shouldn't have let you go.
But when I didn't, should you change?
Would things go out right or even worse?
Consequences are so unpredictable.
Is there any feelings left?
I don't deserve another slap from you, Loathe.
You should've thought of your daughter first.
I was sweet and very friendly when you haven't been in my peaceful life.
I never had war before. All I love is music and arts. And that's where you are as well married at right?
Yes, I badly miss you: your care, your hugs, your kiss, your fuck. But how about the countless fights? my guilt to my mom and your family, that I want you to fix, but you can't?
I left you first because I can sense that our feelings is dying. I can see that you still miss "d'mom". I left you so you could fix your life and become a good dad to your daughter. But I guess you can't do anything bout it.
Again, I almost LOVED you. I know you need someone who could be there for you, who you can talk to and be your lover and friend forever. But the barriers are so strong that it complicates our bond. I can't be an icon of your lust to your friends. I don't wanted to be the recycle bin of your sperms. You may or may not have loved me, but I am not the kind of girl that you can take home.
Alright, I accept the fact now. I had several thoughts of leaving you, begging for my freedom. And now I guess, this is the reward that I asked from you, Loathe. Thanks for your new witch bitch for taking my burden away. Though I can see that the crowd is not against your relationship, they even liked it. Though I can see that you can take her home because her mom isn't aware and concerned of where she will be. I'm glad to have someone proud of you, Loathe. I guess you just got the perfect type of girl for you. I know my mom should've known you better for her to like you, but you are not that brave to face her. You should've fixed things with d'mom and your family, i know you still can't leave her unless she'll leave you. I could've loved you but the world is against us... and you, Loathe, can't do anything/everything to fight against the world for us.
I guess, I had realized the reason why I shouldn't be with you. I eventually knew, it wasn't love after all. It was a game that I should know. You were never mine, I was never yours. Who falls first, lose. Who leaves last, wins. I guess you win, Loathe. But I got the reward I was wanting when I'm wih you: FREEDOM.
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY LOATHE
